"Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose" - Yoda
I once thought that statement was completely nonsense and ridiculous until i experience it myself. Like the fuck why? Why we have to let go of something that we love? What if we're too 'letting go' of it and it really goes away?
Okay, on this post i'm gonna be focused on letting go of someone, but in the end this can actually relate to anything such as try to let go of your past school, the passing of your loved pets, etc.
First of all, I've just experienced the worst breakup so far in my life. I always thought that he's the only one who could actually made my life complete, the only one who could made myself truly happy, the one that i was deeply in love with, and of course the one that i just couldn't let go of. And when the broke up happened, the worst, sucks days of my life suddenly comes and it actually fucked me up, stressed me out.
And that stressful situation made my-stupid and confused-self did something that i really, really regret until today: begged, pleaded him to love me again.
I kept held onto him eventhough deep in my heart i know he didn't love me anymore. I kept telling myself, "He will love me again, just like the happy old days" and just couldn't stop begged him to get back again with me. I felt so empty and lonely, all i thought about was him, i didn't even know what to do with my life--i couldn't even imagine my future without him on the picture. And at that time, i was stupid and blind i thought that i didn't have another option to made him come back to me except holding on to him.
And of course, it didn't work.
Because we cannot force someone to love us.
But well, those days of suffers has passed, and here i am. Still alone but not lonely, live happily and fill my life to the fullest :))
That is because i finally try to learn "The Art of Letting Go".
Let it go. Let him go. Because holding on does way a lot more damage.
Try to learn to let go of every single thing you love. When you're letting go, you will not get fucked up when they're actually gone (well maybe just a lil bit fucked up, but it's not gonna get any worse because you've actually learned to love and let go at the same time since the beginning). Keep in your mind that if they're really made for you, whatever happened life will actually do their job and they will eventually come back to you. But if they didn't, then it's not meant to be yours on the first place.
I learned to accept my life without the one i loved the most. I grieved as i need to, and after that i should focus on something more important than my past: my future. Another lesson i learned from my past relationship is not everyone you love will stay, not everyone you trust will be loyal, some people only exist as examples of what to avoid. Train your mind to look for the best in every situation, even the worst one will give yourself a good lesson. And trust me, when you already 'mastered' this art of letting go, your life will eventually come back in peace.
Here's another words i found really helpful from my instagram:
"Don't feel stupid for missing him, even if he treated you like shit. You still had happy memories and you're always going to miss them. Don't try to replace him, cause you won't. Just get through each day and eventually it'll get better. I promise. Eventually someone will come into your life and whether or not you realize it, they're going to be something special to you. So don't throw yourself at every guy you see, trying to replace him, or at least dull the memories, cause you're only going to make yourself see how hard he is to replace. Someone better will eventually come along."
NB: My broke up happened 5 months ago lol. But i found a trilogy fiction book that i currently loveee so much, "The School for Good and Evil" by Soman Chainani. On the third book, the main character, Agatha, was forced by the situation to let go of his prince, Tedros, to save the world. She is a really wise, young character, and she finally could let Tedros go with her bestfriend, Sophie. But in the end, Tedros was actually meant to be hers since the beginning. No matter how hard life tried to separate them, each of them will actually find their way back to each other. That book just remind me of my past breakup so i choose to wrote a post about it :)